Monday, April 24, 2006

#1: April 24, 2006

I think I used to do this all the time.
Poems, I mean; not very well, of course.
Clumsy iambs, toes caught on the rhyme,
And dactyls graceful as a three-legg'd horse.

Clumsy, but it didn't matter then.
No one cared much when the meter'd slip.
I was my only reader, so no sin
To sit, pull out a pen, and let 'er rip.

I miss that freedom now, that unconcern
So much like bravery. Ignorance in there too,
For youth lets us write things that we would burn
By armloads, were we older, if we knew.

Like this, for instance. Still, I'll let it stay.
I'll get the matches out another day.

3 comments:

Jack said...

Nice piece, in the vein of the foolishness of writing poetry, combined with the inevitable foolishness of youth. Tis true, tis true. I love the inversion in the fourth foot of the third line, and the deliberate gallop of "graceful as a three-legg'd."

Recommend reworking lines 11 and 12 and you would have a pretty consistent piece. Not the right place for the meter to stumble, as it was the right place in the first stanza. Something more regular, like "In youth we write the follies we would burn/ Posthaste, if we were older, if we knew." But fine work.

Anonymous said...

Your substantial collection is quite extraordinary. So much of the human condition plays out in your crafted sonnets. A daily sonnet for a week is a wonder, but a year and beyond of such work? Amazing. I've recently started a subject specific sonnet blog. Each takes between 3 and 10 hours to draft. Your productivity is admirable. You've missed out on a lot of great reality TV through the years!
Thanks for the easy link to your first sonnet. Skilled from the start o this project. My view is different from Jack's. Seems that lines 11 and 12 do a splendid job of setting up the closing couplet.
If inclined, you might find the sonnet blog I've started this summer interesting. Accessed at http://psychsonnets.com/
Michael

Scott said...

Hi Michael--thanks for reading, and for taking the time to comment! I think your idea for PsychSonnets is an excellent one--you've set yourself a challenge, to be sure, but such a wealth of material and subjects! Best wishes to you as you continue with it. I'll be reading. :)

My sonnets don't take as long as yours do usually...and I think it shows, most of the time. ;) Sometimes they come to me in a flash, sometimes I work on them on and off throughout the day, either in writing or turning them over in my mind. I've always been a fan of Shakespeare, of iambic pentameter, and of formal poetry, so after years and years of reading such stuff, sometimes it just comes easy. But sometimes...not so much.

Anyway, thanks again for reading, and for taking the time to comment.

S