Tuesday, November 07, 2006

#198: November 7, 2006

I got up on the wrong side of the bed,
Quite literally--my forehead smashed the wall,
Caving the sheetrock. "Jesus Christ!" I said,
And stubbed my toe on moldings in the hall,

As though in punishment for blasphemy.
My throbbing toenail, scraggy and ingrown,
Snagged the carpet, and like a flesh Slinky™,
I tumbled down the stairs, bruised to the bone.

For a moment I lay still and tried to breathe,
My eye gouged on my dislocated thumb,
Awake just moments--I could not believe
The Three Stooges film my life had become.

I limped to my bedroom, put on my clothes,
And while shaving, sneezed and sliced off my nose.

1 comment:

mrs.tool said...

Heh.
My 5-year-old niece, who takes after me in more ways than one, had this question for me when we got to her house Saturday for a visit: "Aunt Jimfer, why are we so clumsy?"

I just told her that's the price you pay for being born with both beauty and brains.