Sunday, March 25, 2007

#334: March 23, 2007

The Spartan council dares not take the chance
to go against the Oracle's dictates;
therefore 300 march on the Hot Gates
clad only in their leatherette Hot Pants.

King Leonidas wears his manly beard
(his only patch of Spartan body hair);
he waxes legs and abs and pecs with care,
and yet nobody seems to think that's weird.

'Oil up your spears and ope the breaches, men!
Let those fey councilmen back home debate!
Now thrust and thrust again! Now penetrate!
Up to the hilt, my Spartans, stick it in!

'Show Xerxes's horde what true manliness means!
A lesson for all future kings and queens.'


middleclasstool said...

So gay...and homophobic. It made my head asplode.

ThatGreenyFlower said...

uh, do you mean assplode?