Put pots under the skylight where it leaks,
and oil up every hinge on every door.
To fix the stairs, apply woodscrews to squeaks;
nail rolled linoleum back to the floor.
Try not to tear your socks on carpet tacks,
and pack rolled towels round drafty windowpanes;
go spackle well the spidered ceiling cracks,
and pour some caustic chem down hair-choked drains.
If walls are marked with crayon, grease, and muck,
one coat of paint works wonders, I've been told.
Now then, you'd best reserve that moving truck;
it won't be long before this pit is sold.
Just let the next poor suckers right this ship;
meantime, we'll find another house to flip.
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