I've never found a hippo in my bed,
Nor giraffes hiding beneath my basement stairs;
And when I go to clean the storage shed,
I've not surprised a penguin hiding there.
I've yet to discover a nest of writhing snakes
In my grandma's old leather steamer trunk;
Not even a lion, for goodness sakes,
In the attic--just piles of dusty junk.
Coyotes in the pantry there are none,
And iguanas are also something scarce;
Piranhas in the toilet? Not a one;
And dust bunnies, not tigers, under chairs.
I don't think I can stay another minute
In a boring house like this with nothing in it!
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